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Do you fast in secret? Don’t you tell others you’re fasting?

Home Forums Intermittent Fasting Forum Diet and Nutrition Do you fast in secret? Don’t you tell others you’re fasting?

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    • #2692


      I’ve been fasting for varying lengths of time for about 2 1/2 weeks now and NO ONE (except you girls) knows about it. Most days I have been skipping breakfast and today I am doing my 5th 24 hr. (dinner to dinner) fast. I am still eating dinner with my family every night.

      My husband knows that I have been frustrated with my weight lately, so I told him that my plan was to try to manage my calorie budget to “eat less” during the day, so that I could have a little more food at dinner time. My husband rarely eats breakfast and sometimes only has cheese and crackers at lunchtime. Still, I have always been a breakfast-eater and I don’t want to freak him out with the fasting thing.

      I actually haven’t told him anything about fasting at all. He’s always been super-supportive of whatever I’ve done in the past, so I think I’ll tell him eventually. But right now, I kind of feel like I want to just fast for a while and see how it goes. If I have the kind of success that I am planning to have, I guess that will speak for itself.

      Anyway, I was just wondering how others are handling this and your thoughts/ feelings about telling others in your life.

    • #2694


      Well, in my personal situation I have been on some kind of diet or doing some “new” thing as far as weight loss goes my whole life. Seriously! Anyway, everyone that knows me (even co-workers) is no longer surprised at anything I do.

      but there are some people….like my mother – who I am not going to say anything to because she is a negative person and nothing that I do – will ever be the way that she would have done it – so, I will not go there with her.

    • #2695


      My advice: be careful who you tell. If they voice their doubts, even if you KNOW you’re right, those little insidious voices will start snaking their way into your consciousness before you even realize it, and you start telling yourself the same things. Especially if the little food monster inside of you is egging it on, anything for delicious tasty food!

      For example, my friend is trying to lose weight as well, but she is doing Weight Watchers. She eats fruit ALL DAY LONG. When I mention I’m fasting while she’s snacking, she tells me, “Oh, I could never do that, I just get too weak and unfocused and I have such an active job…”.

      But afterward, I will find myself questioning whether I really need to fast all day long, And I don’t do it because I think she’s right, I do it because the food monster is saying, “Yessss…. you want food… I want food… whatever will convince you to feed me….”

    • #2696


      I used to get grief somewhat from my DH when I first started fasting, but now he just asks – Are you eating tonight? If I’m not no big deal. I think the longer you do something that isn’t having a negative effect on your life, the more most people will support you. I still don’t tell people unless asked…

    • #2697


      I’m quite covert, just because I don’t discuss eating with people around me. Oh, need to mention here: I’m living abroad and I don’t have close relationships here. So, nobody really cares what/how/when I’m eating. Which is good.

      I also told myself before I came here: If I don’t manage my weight now, it will never happen. It’s the best and last opportunity, basically.

      However, which is really good, you can be rather сovert in spring… without that much trouble. Just don’t mention weight loss but give Lent as explanation and everybody is silent, because it might be a religious thing. And you don’t comment on people’s religion, right?

    • #2698

      I’m a little bit afraid of what people’s reaction will be, so it’s easier just to keep it to myself. And the traditional ESE approach of two fasts a week is SUPER easy to do without people knowing. It just gets harder if I try to fast for longer than 24 hours or do several in a week.

      I’ve been anxiously awaiting Lent so that I can try and use that excuse.

    • #2699


      I haven’t told anyone about it, not even my husband. I have mentioned that I am just trying to eat less, but most of my girlfriends that are trying to lose some weight are CONVINCED BEYOND A SHADOW OF A DOUBT that you have to eat 6 meals a day.

      The one day I mentioned that I only 2 times that day, you would have thought the earth was coming to an end! I have not repeated that mistake! It is just sad to me, because they are NOT losing and are getting frustrated but will listen to nothing else.

    • #2700


      Well funny you ask because since reading ESE I have found lots of people that have not yet been hit by any fitness/diet trends propaganda naturally fast. Like here in the french community of Quebec, because of language and cultures differences people still naturaly assume that to loose weight or maintain weight one must eat less.

      Whenever it’s the Easter brunch or Christmas Eve I hear people asking each other ‘have you eaten today’ and most of the time they’ll go ‘Noooo’ sub-text like ‘saving it all for the big dinner’ It amazes me how I got screwed up by all the fitness mags while most of family knew the truth all along (LOL).

      So I’ve gone full circle…not to mention that’s the way I used to loose weight when I was a teenager I would just skip some meals here and there…So I don’t intentionally tell people I fast but if they ask I tell the truth.

      I also love having frequent snacks throuhout the day sometimes, the less rules I have the less I think about food. Sometimes I just find myself fasting unintentionally if that’s a word.

    • #2701


      I’ve told a few people and had very different reactions. Mostly examples of what you all have already said. My husband is completely aware of ESE and fasting. It’s ok with him as long as I’m healthy and basically in a good mood.

      It’s interesting to mention to people whom you know will have a reaction, then just lean back in your chair and see where they go with their rant. I once had a (drunk) friend go on and on about how 1000 calories a day was just way too low for any healthy person, let alone someone who works out regularly, etc. etc. It was amusing to listen to and didn’t threaten me in any way!

    • #2702


      This thread has given me real cause to think about how I am ‘pre’ reacting to what I know will be other peoples reactions to my body shape goals. I have not told anyone other than hubby and I won’t tell anyone else.

      I am already being told that I am in great shape by most of my friends, and I have to say that to a person almost everyone I know is overweight. The most I will say is that I have tightened up my diet a bit.

      I can see that I have used a number of tactics to ‘veil’ what I have been doing. I am already wheat intolerant so my friends are used to me eating a certain way.

      Instead of people commenting that I am not eating junk or enough, I am getting a lot of sympathy for my plight as people really get the elimination diet thingy.

      I am also organising to catch up with people at times that are a bit easier for me to manage food (or no food) such as coffee, not lunch. Funny how without even thinking of it, I have managed the situation so it looks normal.

      Like April mentioned about Quebec, in HK people actually get that you have to decrease cals to lose weight. Many of my local friends do not eat breakfast and also naturally manage calorific dense food by eating less of it.

    • #2706

      Such a great thread. I have told a couple people of the intermittent fasting that I have started, but I don’t talk about potentially doing 24 hour fasting. Even when I speak of the change in my diet, I have the doubters that tell me, oh you look fine. A little fat there is healthy, etc etc. So I figure I’ll live with my food/eating choices, keep them to myself unless I am specifically asked. I don’t really feel like dealing with other peoples perspectives that haven’t done the research or understand what I am doing.

      So, I’m a covert faster.

    • #2707

      oh! You know what else I thought of today as I was thinking about this very topic? If someone asks me how I eat, I’ll just tell them the average amount of calories I eat in a day based on my weekly calorie intake. I double people will question my answer if I say, “Oh, yeah I average about _______ a day.” lol They just might not know exactly how I do that.

    • #2708

      I have been doing ESE for about 5 months now and the only person that knows is my husband. Only because he started noticing my skipping breakfast. Much to my amazement he was not the least bit surprised of what I am doing. He thinks I look great but knows that I want to improve. Now other people keep telling me I need not lose weight, “you better not get any skinnier” and other stuff. I will never tell anyone else what I am doing because they will think I have an eating disorder and don’t want to bother explaining.

    • #2709


      I guess I look at some people a little differently. Some truly have been sabatoged themsleves and really want to know what a person tries. I can honestly understand when they say “I can’t do it”.

      I also had a terrible time at fasting and gained more weight as the result. BUT I kept trying. Some people really do make bad comments, but some really want to know and I find sorting out who is a sabatogee, and who is genuine.

      My weight lifting partner really does get sick if she doesn’t eat breakfast, I have watched her run to the bathroom or almost loose it on the floor. So I guess we also need not be so touchy about what we are trying to accomplish, but I am also not afraid to say what needs to be said to someone being rude.

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